Learn to Kill Zombies in One Easy Step!

What Halloween would be complete without a history lesson? Let me educate you, because if the vampires don't get you, the zombies certainly will.


What is a zombie?

Not a Zombie.

A zombie is a corpse brought back to life by magic. They have been considered "cool" among Westerners since the late 19th century.  


According to the West African religion Vodun, a sorcerer can reanimate a corpse. Because the undead has no will of his own, he is under the control of the sorcerer.


In Haitian Vodou culture, a Zombi is someone who dies without ever having been possessed by a Vodu. (Consider this the Vodou equivalent to dying without having asked Jesus into your heart.)Because this person has no Vodu, they cannot go to heaven; instead they can only roam the earth.


Another Haitian theory behind the existence of the Zombis is that they were revived by medicine men to do their will. They can fly too, by shooting red flame from their armpits.


How can you cure a Zombie?


The remedy is less violent and dramatic than Hollywood would have you believe. No high-powered rifles necessary, just sodium.


That's right. A Big Mac will do. The salt snaps them out of their zombie-stupor and they realize that being a zombie kind of sucks. Then they go about their business. Besides, even if the NaCl doesn't cure them, hardening of the arteries will eventually get them.


Believe what you will about Zombies, but this story is creepy and well-documented. The account I'm using was published in "Man: A Record of Anthropological Science" in March 1945, and was written by Louis P. Mars, M.D.

Zombie.

On 24 October 1936, a lady stumbled into the village of Ennery wearing nothing but rags. She was about 60, and her skin was wrinkled and scaly. She had no eyelashes and couldn't stand sunlight. She kept her face covered with a black cloth.

One of the families recognized her. Her name was Felicia Felix-Mentor. Same face, same height, same limp. One small problem. Felicia died in 1907, at the age of 29. But the family, even Felicia's widower, was certain that this was not just any zombie.

She didn't know her name, or anything else about herself, whoever she was. She sort of just mumbled. She would randomly burst out into bouts of soulless laughter. She alternated between 1st and 3rd person speech.

In the limited research I have done, I have been unable to discover anything more about the Zombie lady's fate. However, Zora Neale Hurston wrote a contemporary account of this event. If you're interested, you might look into that.

Goodnight, dear readers, and happy Halloween. Sleep tight, don't let the zombies bite.

Always,

Callie